Coming out over the years

I guess I should put a sort of disclaimer of the fact that I didn't know much about being gay on television besides the shows I watched that happened to have a character on there. First, I found out about Ellen because she was on every form of media when she came out of the closet. She was the most well known lesbian at the time. Next thing I figure out, Friends had two girls get together but they were just on the sidelines. I didn't know it was a big deal. Then I watched a show called ER, which happened to deal with a gay character. Again, it wasn't a main storyline but it just happened. Then finally, the only real situation where I saw the process of what it was like was on Glee. They actually had a main character play a gay student and another girl play a lesbian. I believe Demi Lovato is now on there playing a lesbian. Soon after Glee, Pretty Little Liars has a girl, who is the main character, that deals with the struggle of coming out of the closet.

The point of this is to stress the fact that I didn't realize how much time it took to get to this point. I always saw stuff about being gay and lesbian but it was always on the sidelines. Being in an Indian family, my parents were a lot more conservative about us hearing about it. Then they realized it was becoming more mainstream so they didn't care if we heard about it after we reached our teens. I am simply emphasizing the fact that I don't see the big deal about having gay characters or people in life and television. To those who fall in love, you all know you cant help it. Demi Lovato is straight but she plays a gay character and I thought that was brave of her to support her homosexual fans like that. I am straight and I support gay rights because while I was growing up, I was exposed to the idea and I didn't see a problem with it. I think it's about time we have more shows like these so the people who are gay/lesbian feel supported and Ellen definitely helped them have more support. I think she is brave and so is anyone else who dares to fall in love.

Girl Power or Girl Whiner?

While I totally agree that women need to have some sense of empowerment, but I feel like the articles and women "yelling" for people to notice how powerful we are, it loses its true meaning. We fall into the stereotype of women who are submissive, weak, and needy. We have this need for attention, so we act out and call it empowerment.

I'm not calling all girl power movement useless, but they may be coming obsolete. We fall into the princess culture, and fail to come off as the empowered women we strive to be. The phrase, all press is good press, can be brought up, but it becomes this campaign of "look at me," "look at what I can do." And it sucks. This is, I would guess, not what these campaigns are truly about, and it generally misses its target.

One way to break this stereotype, would be to approach all things calmly, so the dramatic out lashes are not seen. So often we see women screaming at news reporter or violently protesting, not good. This is a very negative view for women, and becomes a new stereotype that society sees. Unfortunately, we have to look at how men are handling their lack of empowerment or untrue stereotypes and we see they are not "acting out" like women.

Just some things to keep in mind.

Alternative Reality of Activism?

With the arrival of Facebook in 2004, a social media revolution began. Not only did the way people connected change but also the way they were able to voice their opinions about practically anything. As 9 years have come and gone, today there is an ongoing debate as to whether or not using Facebook can be truly called activism.  According to Webster's dictionary, the definition of activism is the policy or action of using vigorous campaigning to bring about political or social change. Malcolm Gladwell believes that activism requires a person to physically be in the public sphere, at risk or in danger, to have a strong or personal connection to people in the movement, and to put a lot of effort in.  He also believes that Facebook is a tool to manage your acquaintances, and to stay in contact with those people you wouldn't otherwise be able to.  Gladwell says that the platforms of social media are built around weak ties. This is easy to see as the majority of people do not spill their most personal details of their lives. I believe that social media can help to organize groups that actually participate in activism. However, I do not believe that just posting ones thoughts and opinions online on a social media site can be considered activism. While some things may be accomplished by this, more can be accomplished by physically making one's presence known. I also think that physical presence helps to establish one's credibility in whatever he or she is fighting for or against.

Constructing the perfect pop culture family.

This week we talked about all kinds of characters and how they negatively and positively show different genders and sexualities. So I thought it would be fun to take some of the more positive characters on TV and mash them all into one big family.

Notes before we begin
1. I tried to make this not hetronormative, but it ended up that way (I felt bad paring people we weren't cannon LGBTQ). So I decided to go with that TV stereotype of one mom, one day, two kids (girl and boy). I apologies if that offends anyone, as that was not my prerogative.

2. I chose characters based on not only how they acted in a gender and sexually positive way, but also because of flaws they have (making them well rounded characters)

3. If you have any suggestions, or maybe an idea for a perfect pop culture family please comment! (there isn't enough commenting going on here)

Okay here we go;

Mom: Tami Taylor (Friday Night Lights)

Tami was my first choice as soon as I started thinking about this perfect family. Her growth in many aspect of her life make her such a remarkable character. From her career (she starts off the show as a guidance counselor, then works her way up to principal and at the shows end she's made it to Dean of Admissions at one of the top colleges) to her personal (when her husband takes a big job several cities away, she chooses to stay behind and work on her family and career, while still supporting him in his endeavorers). She was also one of the best TV moms in terms of how her and her daughters relationship grew and became on of the most beautiful. Take a look at this small clip of them talking about sex and tell me that's not a remarkable mom

  

Tami Taylor isn't without some problems though. Throughout the show she isn't referred to by her name, but instead by the moniker, Mrs. Coach. As sweet as it is, making her seem like just an extension of her husband, and not a person of her own gives off some troubling vibes. But I think the way she acts as a character that supersedes the bad feelings I get from that name and elevate her to one of the best characters in television history. 

Dad: Dan Connor (Roseanne) 

This one's more a sentimental choice for me, growing up there was no other family I could relate to like I did with the Conner's. Seeing another poor family from Chicago, it made me feel less alone, and seeing that family make it though each day with a smile gave me hope that maybe we could too. Of course my favorite character was Dan, the loveably goofy dad who always had something fun or insightful to say. He is such a good dad character because they don't stick him in that, so dumb he can't do anything category, but instead give his character depth by making him just a little bit smarter then his kids (like most parents his intelligence comes from knowing just a little more then their children). Dan's relationship with Roseanne was also unique, in the later seasons he became a sort of housekeeper after he got fired, leaving Roseanne as the main breadwinner in the household. It was in these episodes that we got to se Dan trying to understand his children and wife better, take this episode "Darlene Fades To Black" which deals with Dan attempting to break his teenage daughter out of a funk, and instead learns a little more about what she's going through personally

As much as I love Dan, he suffers from one big problem, the need to protect women in some kind of white knight way. In one powerful episode Roseanne's sister is beaten up by her boyfriend, Dan decides not to call the cops but instead takes a "real man" action and goes to beat the crap out of the boyfriend. He does this stuff all the time and it lessens his character, who usually isn't concerned with being a "real man" (you'd think living in a house of women would give him some insight to the fact that he doesn't need to be this protector). But overall I think Dan is a good father in this pop culture family, he talks with his kids in a way that intelligent and thoughtful, just like a good day should.

Daughter: Britta Perry (Community) 

Britta Perry is the worst…

But that's what makes her the best. Community is my favorite show and each year when I think back on the characters on TV that made me laugh or just feel the most for, I come back to her. I love her willingness to be the worst, she know she ruins things but that doesn't stop her from trying anything. She will sing, dance, and get involved in political things even though she has no idea on how to do them (or at least how to do them right). Most of all it's her love for the people she cares about that makes her such a great character, she's willing to go above and beyond for them and even if she knows more then likely she will mess it up (or Britta it as it were) but it's the fact that she so willing to try. If there is one problem with Britta it's that she is a little to defined by her friends and no enough by her own personality. I think we need an episode where we take a step back from the group and see her in her own environment and how she behaves, so we can get a better idea of the person she is. 

Son: Brendon Small (Home Movies) 

Another sentimental favorite, Home Movies is one of the reasons I'm at BSU studying Film and Television. The show tapped into so many elements of my childhood (the filmmaking, only having two friends) that I have this intense connection with it. And at the center of it all is Brendon, the dorky child who is more concerned with making his movie then pretty much anything else. Brendon was concerned with typical masculine ideas, I mean take a look at this scene.

Any kid concerned with acting like a real man probably wouldn't be participating in Jazz fights or making romantic comedies in their spare time. Brendon did what he liked, not what the false ideas of masculinity wanted him to do. One thing he would have to work on though is the use of females in his films, since they always seem to be his wife or lover (even when Melissa was a lawyer she would almost always have to fall in love with one of the boys). 

So that's my idea of the perfect pop culture family, one who's positives and flaws make them well rounded. 

Commercial Realism: Feminine Touch

     In the Codes of Gender film that we watched in class, something really irked my nerves. (I know the point of the video, but I’m not going to touch on that.) There was a part in the film where there are ad pictures showing different female models in “defenseless” positions. The argument I have is why are these positions seen as bad?

     Almost always, the female is the controller of sex. She says when and when it’s not okay. The male doesn’t really ever get to choose. So these pictures to me represent a lust effect on the men and the girl is working her power or deceptive power she has over them. EX: There were some pictures with just one female model and multiple male models. The male models were seen as ready to respond and the female model was seen as submissive and defenseless. To me I thought the woman was dominant in the photo for having multiple men want her.

     “The world around them is too much to cope with…” Feminine touch is when we always see women touching themselves in various ways. I think that the “Feminine Touch” is powerful. The author said that we hold things as if they are controlling us; carrying basically air. Maybe we don’t have to do that because often times we can get things very easily done without using the masculine “firm grasp of the hand.”

     If anyone has been watching this season of America’s Next Top Model, it has both women and men competing against each other. The argument from the women’s perspective is that modeling is a women’s profession. They can model their whole body, but what can a man show? Their masculine jaw line? Their abs down to their crotch area?

     Tyra would call the female modeling pictures from the Codes of Gender film H to T modeling! (Head to Toe)

Heteronormity

Today in class we talked about the way homosexuals are portrayed in the media.  I never knew Ellen had a show before her talk show.  Today I think she is like the spokesperson for all things lesbian at least she is the most visible lesbian I know.  So, she has a chance to change our heteronomity culture.  However, she won't change it.  This country ha sin God we trust on its currency. This means that our viewpoints on a lot of issues are heavily connected with the beliefs of the Judeo-Christian religion.  In society today statically the majority of the people in the world are heterosexual.  So, by definition to be homosexual is against the norm.  While I think heteronormity will never disappear I do believe that people are starting to be more knowledgeable and accepting about the topic.  There are several examples in the media of how what use to be taboo is becoming more and more common.  When I see a T.V. show and one of the characters is gay I still assume he's heterosexual but when I find out he's gay it is not a real shock.  The biggest example of this was brought up in class today.  There is an NBA player who has just come out of the close.  However the thing that is most different about this occurrence is that he didn't wait till his retirement to announce it. So, while it would be a stretch to say that heteronormity is starting to stop it is not so crazy to say that homosexuality isn't so bizarre anymore.

Pleasant Surprise

What's it mean to be a man today?  Does it mean you have to be strong and courageous?  Does it mean you have to be cool but sensitive?  These days man are portrayed in many different ways.  In todays media most times you see the father as this goofy Neanderthal.  The kind of guy who is so sure of himself only because he really isn't sure.  They say funny things and hit their heads on the counter from time to time but other than that they are just comic relief.  Women on the other hand are strong and stern.  They usually keep the house in order and keep the kids in check.  The roles of men and women have completely shifted when it comes to media.  It use to be that the father always knew best.  You could find Lucy at home doing something silly while Ricardo was at work.  In that time period than men seemed to be some perfect being.  He had a nice job and house.  His kids loved him and he always seemed to know how to handle any situation that rose up.  I think that kind of portrayal is more harmful than what we have today. It made women's expectation of men unrealistic.  That's not the way men are.  I would rather have a flawed figure representing me than something unrealistic.  In todays world, men have the advantage of being better than what media says they should be like so women get a pleasant surprise when they find their loves.